hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize