Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize