I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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