i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Randomize