I'm pants shitting drunk right now
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
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