If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize