I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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