So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
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We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
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i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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