I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
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I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
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Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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