Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words: blizzard sex
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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