Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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