after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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