i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize