If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize