i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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