I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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