I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize