My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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