Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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