Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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