I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize