I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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