You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
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We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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