I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize