You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
a search helicopter?!
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Randomize