dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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