hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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