my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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