My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
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He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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