In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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