I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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