Have you finally orgasmed yet?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize