Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize