He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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