So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
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