Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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