That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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