I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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