i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
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That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
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In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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