just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize