Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
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good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
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And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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