Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize