hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
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