Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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