if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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