i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize