So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
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