I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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