think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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