I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize